Nothing upsets a busy hardworking wife like finding out
that that while she is busy making a living to carry her own
share of the family’s burden, her husband is busy having
rounds of steamy sex with the maid.
Saturday PUNCH spoke with a number of ladies who sFirst
up is Mrs. Adedolapo, a mother of two. She told Punch that
she became certain her husband was sleeping with her
help when the very respectful 22-year-old housemaid she
brought into her home in February 2015 started to “look at
me
from the end of her nose.”
She said:
“The main reason I told the girl to come work for
me in the first place was because she was very
respectful. I met her when I went for an outreach in
Yenagoa and brought her to Lagos.
that that while she is busy making a living to carry her own
share of the family’s burden, her husband is busy having
rounds of steamy sex with the maid.
Saturday PUNCH spoke with a number of ladies who sFirst
up is Mrs. Adedolapo, a mother of two. She told Punch that
she became certain her husband was sleeping with her
help when the very respectful 22-year-old housemaid she
brought into her home in February 2015 started to “look at
me
from the end of her nose.”
She said:
“The main reason I told the girl to come work for
me in the first place was because she was very
respectful. I met her when I went for an outreach in
Yenagoa and brought her to Lagos.
“She did everything perfectly; she was very nice
and treated my children well. But after six months, I
noticed that if I walked in and she greeted me by
kneeling, she would mouth a welcome to my
husband with her back turned. I also realised that
this did not seem to bother my husband.
Later I realised that her attitude toward me also
changed. All the respect went out of the window.
Anytime she did something wrong and I got angry,
she looked at me as if I was a mere chicken. I also
noticed that my husband no longer spoke to her in
my presence. If I told her to do something and I
scolded her for doing it wrongly, rather than my
husband to add his voice, he would look away.
I noticed that she no longer respected or feared my
husband anymore. I became really sure something
was going on between both of them when I noticed
she cooked when we had left the house one day. I
got home that evening and asked why she cooked
again.
She said oga (my husband) came home in the
afternoon and was hungry and she had to cook for
him. My husband had never been in the habit of
coming home from work to eat in the afternoon. I
sent her packing in August last year.”
Mrs. Adedolapo, who works in a travel agency, said she
did not confront her husband and neither did she give him
any explanation as to why she sent the housemaid packing
soon after.
“The surprising thing is that he never asked me why
I sent the lady away,” she said.
SECOND LADY works with a new generation bank in Lagos.
She told pUNCH that she had been married for 10 years
until 2014 when she separated from her husband. Reason?
Her husband was sleeping with their housemaid too.
“We have been on this matter now for almost two
years. Our families have been trying to settle the
matter. But if I forgive him, it is hard to forget. If I
could erase what he did from my mind, then I would
forgive him completely,” the woman said.
She called herself Mrs. AngryNaijaWoman. She said she
would prefer to be referred to as that in this report.
Mrs. AngryNaijaWoman told Punch that she first noticed
the sign of trouble when she realised that her housemaid
was showing symptoms of pregnancy.
“The girl was 24 at the time. She had been with us
for three years. The first week I started noticing
some physical changes in her body, I jokingly told
her that I hoped she was not pregnant. She said no.
But by the third week, I was sure something was
not right. So, I took her for a test and it was
confirmed that she was pregnant.
I was shocked. I took her home and sat her down to
tell me who impregnated her. She first gave the
name of a younger cousin of my husband’s, who
was staying with us for some time.
I informed my husband and we summoned his
cousin, because he had got his own
accommodation not long before that. All this while,
I was agonising over how my housemaid could be
pregnant under our noses, my husband too
expressed surprise.
When my husband’s cousin came and we told him
what the housemaid had said, he denied flatly that
he was responsible for the pregnancy. But
surprisingly, he told me that he had actually slept
with her a number of times but always ensured he
wore condom.
We kept pestering the lady for answers, asking her
if any other person was involved. I decided to calm
down and took her inside to ask her privately. That
was when she told me that my husband also slept
with her. I beat the hell out of her but she kept
repeating that she was telling the truth.
I confronted my husband and he too pounced on the
lady and started beating her for lying against him.
Yet, she maintained her stand. I threatened my
husband that we would let the lady give birth and
do a DNA test on her child. But my friend told me
that if I did that, it would be like shooting myself in
the foot. I personally took the lady for an abortion
and sent her packing afterwards.”
Mrs.AngryNaijaWoman told Punch that the marriage has
been strained ever since.
She said even though her husband continued to deny the
accusation, she knew in her heart that the housemaid was
telling the truth.
Asked why she took the maid for an abortion, she said she
did not want to wait to find out the father of the child
between her husband and his cousin.
“It was clear they were both sleeping with the maid
without the other knowing,” she said.
As harsh as it may sound, Mrs. AngryNaijaWoman’s case
is one that has become all too common.
THIRD WOMAN, a middle-aged woman named Kabirat
Jimoh, in November 2015 approached the Oshodi
Customary Court in Lagos over her husband’s cavorting
with their housemaid. But the husband allegedly took the
affair a notch higher.
Kabirat was in tears as she told the court that her husband,
Sefiu, had to abandon his matrimonial home altogether and
moved in with the housemaid in an apartment he rented for
the teenager.
Kabirat said he allegedly abandoned her and their three
children to live in a one-room apartment.
She told the court that they had been married for 17 years.
She said she had travelled briefly when her husband
started sleeping with the girl. According to her, she only
knew something was going on between the two of them
when the girl became insolent.
“Whenever I asked her to do a chore, she would
look me in the eye and tell me that she was tired.
Whenever I threatened to take her back to our
village, my husband would threaten to deal with
me,” she said.
However, with all these kind stories as the backdrop,
Saturday PUNCH found out ways many career women are
devising to prevent ‘sexcapades’ between their
housemaids and husbands.
Saturday PUNCH spoke with Mrs. Rachael Fasina, who
explained that when she found out that many housemaids
deliberately go out of their way to seduce their bosses’
husbands, she decided never to leave her housemaid alone
at home.
“When I took the children to school in the morning, I
took her along with me to work. She would stay in
the office till we closed and we went home together.
I thought it was better not to give chance to any
temptation. But I had to later let her go because
people advised that there was no point keeping her
if I could not leave her alone at home,” she said.
Fasina said she later opted for a middle-aged house help,
who comes around the house in the morning and leaves at
night because “that is safer.”
“I don’t want a young lady that would come and
wear mini-skirts in my house,” she said.
Another career woman, told Punch that if a man does not
have sexual restraints, even the wife’s relations would not
be off limit to him.
“If I am going to take a relation as housemaid, I
would rather take my husband’s relation,” the
woman said.
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